Cheap Thrills

Wow, it's been two months since I've last updated this blog. Well, I barely have time for blogging nowadays. My Tumblr was even abandoned for some time.

So anyway, let me just share some of my cheap finds recently. I'm a cheapskate, so these things make me happy!

1. Mini Stop's Fried Chicken

I'm a fried chicken lover (Chicken Joy in particular!), and I always wanted to try Mini Stop's Fried Chicken. There will always be a long queue of lines in Mini Stop during lunch time, and it's all because of this. So when I've had a chance last week, I finally grabbed one for lunch, and OMG, it sure tastes good! There's also a free refill for their gravy! AND IT'S JUST FOR P55! Btw, the photo above is not true, cos  there are no Lipton Iced Tea that comes with this meal! Or maybe, just in the Technohub branch? Heh.

2. Asian Secrets Lulur 

I read about this some time last week, and when I got a chance to pass by at Watson's (it's only available there), I bought the smaller tub, just to give it a try. And just like everyone else, I am happy with the results of this body scrub! First of all, it smells good and it'll stay even after a couple of hours! I really don't have to apply lotion that much every time I use this! And yes, it's so cheap for a body scrub. Small tub will cost you at around P80, while the bigger one is just for P130+! This is a must try, I tell you!

3. Latagan Sa Cubao Expo 

Last November 20, I was strolling around Araneta Center, and  decided to drop by Cubao X to check on some shoes. I had no clue about this bazaar, and I was in awe with all of the selections that were on sale! Cheap clothes, artsy stuff, books, shoes, etc! I was tired from buying stuff from SM Cubao, so I only grabbed a couple of things here. Several clothes, a bag, and a pair of shoes for just P385! Huzzah! They'll have another on the 4th, but I don't think I can make it since it's our company's Christmas party. Sigh. Or maybe not. Lol.

4. Cental BBQ Boy Grill!

"Where Everyday is a Weekend!"

I celebrated my 24th birthday  in their Makati branch (where I got so drunk that a friend even have to bring me home lol). I suggested this to my boyfriend when we're thinking of a place to drink on his birthday a couple of weeks ago. They sell cheap food and drinks, that's why they are always filled with people even on a weekday! A plate full of Nachos for just 135? Buffalo chicken wings for P95? Yay, right? My favorite would be their best seller drink which is called "Bad Trip". It's a mix of gin, rhum, pineapple juice and Absolut, I think! It will just cost you P199 per pitcher, and they also have a promo of Buy 2, Take 1 on their mixed cocktails every weekdays! We've been to their Central branch every week since November had started. Lol.

Well, there you go! Isn't it nice to find stuff that won't make you really spend that much? Heh.

Party Crasher

So it's been two months now since I moved to UP Technohub (from Edsa Central). I already met new friends, and adjusted to the new environment. I like my new work location, because it is so convenient, that it only takes me 10 minutes and P55-P60 cab fare every time I go to work.

But despite this work contentment (no, not really), it hit me last week that I really miss the people that I used to work with for the past 3 years. Thankfully, I had no work last Monday, so I kinda "gate crashed" at their party. They missed me, too, I guess?

Photos!

Spot me

Workforce guys. I've been with them for 3 months, and I miss being part of their team.

Um, LOL?

I dunno if you can spot here the leggings that I wore that night, which I eventually removed before I went to the dance floor. Heh.

This pose never gets old

I have gorgeous friends

<3

Fun!

Something Peculiar, II

So last night, I saw this on my Tumblr dashboard, and I reblogged it immediately (not even wondering what movie this came from). It is just relevant, okay?

Then hours after that, I decided to watch Another Cinderella Story (finally! cos I have a copy oif this film for a couple of months already, and it was just last night that I got to watch it) after watching a serious documentary about Ninoy Aquino. I just wanna get rid of the sad feeling before falling asleep. Then I saw that particular scene and all I could say was "WTF?!" Lol.

The universe is trying to tell me something, dontcha think? Heh. Loljk. I was just in awe with this kind of coincidence.

"You see, everyone has a baggage..."

“…It’s a part of life. But like anything else, it’s easier when someone gives you a hand with it.”

This Ted Mosby quote is so relevant that I posted it twice or thrice already on Tumblr.

People say that I should stay on guard with my current ~relationship~, because things are complicated on his side. They say that I’m too young to handle this kind of situation, and that made me think hard before pursuing this thing with him. But just like Ted (I think I’m like him IRL lolol), I (or they) keep on pointing out his baggages, but I just realized that I have my own baggages, too. Perhaps coming from a painful breakup (lolwhat) has its downside. There were instances that when I am seeing that things were like the previous relationship that I’ve had, I will remember the feeling I’ve had back then and would feel completely paranoid, which is wrong. I dunno. I’m still keeping myself on guard, not because of his baggages, but because I’m afraid to be hurt like that again.

Lol. This weather makes me wonder, I guess.

Finally Caved In

"Right when she’d given up and stopped looking, she stumbled into her own fairytale." - Dawson Leery, Dawson’s Creek

It's been almost a year since I've been dumped by the recent ex-boyfriend, and I think it's true that good things happen when you least expect it.

It all started with a cup of coffee. We had a bet regarding the recent NBA finals (lol idek), and whoever wins will have a free coffee from the loser. Of course, I lost, but it's okay. I have a crush on him since early this year, but we barely talk to each other. And the rest, as they say, was history.

You see, I barely blog or tweet about him, or about us. Unlike with the past relationships that I've had, I like to be discreet this time. No, not that discreet, discreet. IRL friends barely know details about us. People at work were surprised when they found out that we're going out (or finally are a couple!). It's just that after several failed relationships, maybe, I wanted things to be different this time.

It's funny that when you've given it all on your previous what-you-thought-was-ideal relationship, you would not question the ideality of the relationship, but will just focus on things that make you both happy, which is more important, right?

And speaking of things that make me happy, I remember posting this a couple of months ago, and I can see that I have an 8/10 out of that checklist.

1. Good Conversation
> Things started with having a sensible/gibberish conversation over a cup of coffee. I want someone who I can learn things from. Someone who knows he is smart, but does not shove it in my face.
2. Lots of hugs
<3
3. Can understand my need for blogging / tweeting some stuff about us
>LOL I'm not really blogging stuff about us, (well, I don't know now that I already started it), but he reads this blog hahaha!
4. Movie Buddy
> We already watched a lot of chick flicks, and Star Cinema movies (yes, even Sarah Geronimo's Hating Magkapatid!), even though he's not a fan of those kind of films. Heh!
5. Honesty
6. Communication
7. Drinking Buddy
> Cheers?
8. Love. <3

As for the letters and camwhore buddy, I dunno. He's not fond of writing letters (sad face) and we don't have a chance to take a lot of pictures of ourselves. But it's okay :)

I'm happy that we both took a chance on things. Blame that quote ("What and If are two non-threatening words that when put together can haunt you for the rest of your life.")  from Letters to Juliet which we watched on our second date, heh!

Yay for 2010

2009 was a pretty bad year for me (work-related stuff, family issues, two break-ups, etc.), but I guess being optimistic at the end of that year helped a lot!

I got promoted at work two weeks ago. It's just sad that I have to be away from the people that I've been working with for the past 3 years, but thinking that I'm just 10 minutes away from work makes me giddy. I still have to adjust to new people (and responsibilities, lol!).

Also, after a year of being hmm ~single~, I can say that my love life has finally opened another chapter (LOLWHAT). Well, anyway, I'll blog about that some other time.

I also heard a lot of good news from my friends this year. My college best friends all got married this year, and one of them is already pregnant!  Then a high school friend got a scholarship to pursue medicine. My high school friends who broke up after being together for 7 years are now back in each other's arms just a couple of weeks ago. Another high school friend (whose boyfriend died March 2009), also found someone who's worth a second chance on love.

Four more months before the year ends, and I hope I'm not putting a jinx on things. I'm just thankful with all these good stuff that had come my way this year! Cheers, 2010!

Brilliant, Just Brilliant

 

Just like what everyone had said, this film was brilliantly made. I was completely blown away while / after watching it last night. Same feeling I've had after watching The Dark Knight, which was of course, another masterpiece of Christopher Nolan. Also, the brilliant cast made me love it even more (Err, Tom Hardy? Ellen Page?). How many times do I have to use the word brilliant in this post? Lol.

 

All I did today was recommend this to my siblings and friends, telling them that they'd miss half of their lives if they don't watch it. Lol.  However, I'm kinda disappointed that some of my friends weren't interested (at all) in watching this film. Like, oh my god why? Well, haha, I just decided to watch it after reading some of the rave reviews from the people that I follow in Twitter and Tumblr. Their reactions made me curious enough to watch it. I'm not a fan of sci-fi films, I'm sarreh. But it was all worth it! It's a good thing too that we decided to watch it in 2D. P191 was a good price for this film.

This probably sums up my (and the whole theater's) reaction after that fucking ending! Hahaha! I might watch it again one of these days. Maybe after  watching Sarah Geronimo's "Hating Kapatid". Heh.

Something Peculiar

I was never really fond of reading horoscopes. I read them from time to time, but never actually believed them. I love my Zodiac sign, though. You see, I was born on the 21st of June which turned out to be a cusp or the boundary of signs. I am Gemini / Cancer. But thanks to the new Zodiac sign shenanigan, I am now just a Gemini.

Well anyway, I was at the office lobby when I saw a copy of Cosmopolitan's issue for the month of June. Then while browsing the magazine, I stumbled upon the horoscope for the said month. All I could say was "WOW." after reading my horoscope for June.

"A cute co-worker is into you. Have a coffee run with him, cos that’s all he needs to ask you out."

It was last month when my co-worker (that I had a crush on) asked me out. And as you might have guessed, our first date was in a coffee shop.

I just find it funny when things like this happen.

You Can Say It's Relevant

Or maybe not.

"I think we’re just going to have to be secretly in love with each other and leave it at that." - The Royal Tenenbaums

The one that got away
Source: The Manila Times
By: Mark J. Macapagal (2007)

In your life, you'll make note of a lot of people. Ones with whom you shared something special, ones who will always mean something. There's the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you lost your virginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you're with...and the one that got away.

Who is the one that got away? I guess it's that person with who everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn't fall the right way, I suppose.

I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a longtime partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little niceties of giddy romance.

How often have you gone through it without even realizing it? When you're not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn't matter who you're with, it just doesn't work. Small problems become big; inconsequentials become dealbreakers simply because you're not ready and it shows. It's not that you and the person you're with are no good; it's just tha t it's not yet right, and little things become the flashpoint of that fact.

Then one day you're ready. You really are. And when this happens you'll be ready to settle down with someone. He or she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life, but it'll work because you're ready. It'll work because it's the right time and you'll make it work. And it'll make sense, it really will.

So that day comes when you're finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want, and you've become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there's no telling when this day will come. Hopefully you're single but you could be in a long-term relationship, you could be married with three kids, it doesn't matter. All you know is that you've changed, and for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person you think about.

You'll think about them because you'll wonder, "What if they were here today?" You'll wonder, "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" That's what the one that got away is. The biggest "What if?" you'll have in your life.

If you're married, you'll just have to accept the fact that the one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of us. But hopefully you're mature enough to realize that you're already with the one you're with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your marriage when you get past it. Sure, you'll think about him/her every so often, but it's alright. It's never nice to live with a "might have been," but it happens.

Maybe the one that got away is the one who's already married. In which case it's the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to
your lips in the future when you're old and gray and reminiscing.

But if neither of that is the case, then it's different. What do you do if it's not yet too late? Simple...find him, find her. Because the very existence of a "one that got away" means that you'll always wonder,
what if you got that one?

Ask him out to coffee, ask her out to a movie, it doesn't matter if you've dropped in from out of nowhere. You'd be surprised, you just might be "the one that got away" as well for the person who is your "the one that got away."

You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won't make a difference. If the timing is finally right, it'll all just fall into place somehow and you know, I'm thinking, it would be a great feeling, in the end, to be able to say to someone, "Hey you, you're the one that almost got away.

Obligatory Birthday Post

In case you didn't know, I turned 24 two weeks ago. Heh.

There are only two occasions that I look forward to celebrating every year: Christmas season and my birthday. Who doesn't want to celebrate their birthday, anyway? I feel special whenever people (especially the unexpected ones) remember my birthday.

Started my day at around 7 in the morning. I was actually surprised with all the greetings that I got on my Facebook, Tumblr and Twitter accounts. Yeah, it was shallow, but it really made me feel giddy. Zach and Rod asked me if I have any plans for lunch (it was a Monday, so my family and most of my friends were at work/school) and we decided to have an eat all you can escapade in TriNoma. It's been a while since I've eaten that much!

Zach and Rod :)

Zach insisted eating here since he missed eating Kapampangan dishes

HEAVEN!

Sucheen and Kittykat :)

 ZachKat (lol)

Went home at around 5 in the afternoon, rested for an hour (early dinner with my family), then headed to Makati to celebrate with my high school friends. We chose Makati over QC cos most of them would be coming from the south part of the metro. I also didn't have work that day, so I agreed that I'd be the one to adjust. Heh. 

First thing I learned at 24: Never get drunk in Makati if you're residing in the QC area. Thankfully, my friend (who lived near my place) fetched me after her shift that night.  I must say I ended that day with a blast. Also, the last birthday greeting was the sweetest I got that day.*wink*

More photos:

All dressed up, while the birthday celebrant was just wearing shorts, racerback and a cardigan. Lol

 Nen :)

 One of the perks of having a friend who works in Rebisco: Having to taste their soon-to-be released products. It's the local version of Cheetos (I guess?).

Ok.

Drunk face is on!

I can say that this year's celebration was better than last year. :) A big hug to those who remembered my birthday!

On Repeat

"The best lyrics are the ones that give you goosebumps, or make you cry in public, or help you realize the answers." - Katy Perry

I usually have some songs on repeat on my iPod for a week or two. I remember listening nonstop to LFO's Girl On TV and Glee's version of Poker Face some time last month, and it's just because those songs put me in a happy mood. This week's LSS do otherwise.


What's Another Day - Maria Mena



"You know concrete colored buildings all grow stale"
You say as I look up dreaming
I know better than to include the both of us
But I can't sleep when you're gone
And you say, "What's another day?"


Beautifully - Jay Brannan



He loved her, but he wasn't too sure
If he could return the love she showed
When she said, my love extends
Beyond the realm of being friends
He kissed her head, and quietly he said
"It's not that you're not beautiful, you're just not beautiful to me"
She said, "How beautiful do I have to be?"

I would always get the feeling of being stabbed in the heart whenever I listen to these songs. I can't remember how many times these songs made me shed tears (before going to sleep, at work, or even in a public transportation).

Lol why am I so emotional these days? I think I should start listening to happy songs again.

So Long, My Luckless Romance

"Should've known you'd bring me heartache. Almost lovers always do." Almost Lovers, A Fine Frenzy

It was this time last year when we became friends, and today, I consider you as one of the best guy friends that I ever had. We have a lot of things in common, and we also influenced each other with our own interests. You made me watch Survivor and American Idol religiously, while I got you addicted to How I Met Your Mother & The Big Bang Theory.

Liking you was inevitable, and I've tried my best to keep it discreet, but I guess you already knew it all along. People thought we were actually are a couple, and they wouldn't believe us whenever we tell them that we're just friends. But there were times that I wished that we actually are.

It's been some time now since I've accepted that we were just bound to be friends; you're the guy best friend that I never had.

I find it funny that we're saying our goodbyes that as if you're going overseas, whereas you'll just change your work location (which is just a few blocks away from my house, lol). Maybe, I'll just miss seeing you five times a week, and spending every break time with you. But just like what you've said to me, you're just 1 call / text / plurk (lol) away, so I guess I have to stop being emotional. You've been wanting this promotion for the longest time, and I want you to know that I am happy for you.

I was apprehensive about writing this entry because I know you'll be able to read this one of these days, but I just want to let you know that you'll be missed big time (I cried after reading your text message yesterday, heh), and good luck on your new career!

The Universe is Funny. Really.

"Right when she’d given up and stopped looking, she stumbled into her own fairytale." -Dawson's Creek

It has been a month or two since I've given up on something that I really wanted. I thought I was patient enough, err, maybe I was still willing to wait, however, there are those times that you know that it's going nowhere and you just have to stop; just for everyone's sake.

I recently realized that I was right about moving on. It was universed! The sudden twist of events left me dumbfounded cos I really didn't see it coming. I was (or am still?) apprehensive because things can get complicated in time, but there's no harm in trying, right? Right?

I've been ecstatic the past few weeks, cos maybe I missed this kind of feeling. It's been some time since I've had a real date! Also, I missed having sensible / gibberish talk over a cup of coffee. It's now back to square one, I guess.

But just when I thought that things were already falling into places, something came up that made me distressed. Why? The person I've given up hope will leave in two weeks time. I remember when I was in high school, I believed that when you're too happy, it wouldn't last long; sadness will come next. It was shallow, I know. But hey, it happened again. And because of this, I almost cried on my way home earlier. It was when my last relationship ended that I cried (like, real hard) inside a bus, and I really didn't care if people were staring at me. I realized that I will sure miss him being there all the time. I'm happy for him, though, cos he's been waiting for this to happen for the longest time. But don't get me wrong here. There were no rekindled feelings. It's just that I hate it when people leave; I hate all sorts of goodbyes.

Anyway, I know the universe has a plan, and that plan is always in motion. It’s a scary thought, but it’s also kind of wonderful. Did I just quote Ted Mosby, again? Heh. For now, I would just enjoy whatever it is that makes me giddy the past few weeks, and maybe, it'll be all worth it.

My Last Birthday With You

So it was 8 years ago, when I've had one of my happiest birthday celebration ever.

It was my 16th birthday, and I thought I would have the usual birthday celebration just like the past years: I would treat my friends for a snack then go home for a family dinner. Right after classes had ended, me and my friends went out for a snack. It was just around 5 in the afternoon, I think. Then an hour later, I received a text message from you, asking me where I was. I told you that I was out with friends, and I was surprised with your reply.

"Maaga nga ako umuwi kasi naghanda ako sa birthday mo. Umuwi ka na."

So I went home immediately after reading that text message. I was surprised seeing that you've prepared a lot of food, (more than my usual birthday celebration) and you've bought me a new mobile phone, too! We had a fun dinner that night.

It was the year after that I came to realize that it was my last birthday with you. So that's why you were mad when I went home a little late than usual during my 16th birthday. I also remember that you were extra sweet to me that day. If only I had known that you'd be gone too soon, I could've done things that you would be so proud of.

It's been 7 years since you left us, but I would always miss you. It's my 24th birthday tomorrow, and I wish I were celebrating it with you. It's also Father's Day today, and if you were still here, I bet it would be a double celebration.

Happy Father's Day, Papa.

Boyfriend Classification, How I Met Your Mother Style

I was reading my old blog entries on my livejournal account when I saw this post I've had last February. I just love this show so much, that I even compare my future relationship on these guys. Heh.

I have the biggest crush on Ted Mosby since I started watching How I Met Your Mother. But if you would ask me if who among the HIMYM characters would I want to have as my boyfriend, I'd choose Marshall Eriksen .

Ted Mosby embodies a boyfriend per se; one who would run an extra mile just to knock you off your feet. The hopeless romantic who always believe in destiny. While Marshall Eriksen is your best friend / boyfriend type of lover. He may not be the sweetest guy that you'll ever meet, but being with him means having a day of endless laughter.

The best TV couple ever -- Marshall & Lily Eriksen.

I am in love with the Marshall & Lily tandem. They are not just husband & wife but also partners in crime. Who wouldn't want to have a love story just like theirs?

“Marshall, I love you because you’re funny and you make me feel loved and you make feel safe. And for our anniversary you gave me a sweatshirt that says, “Lily and Marshall, Rockin’ since ‘96” I kinda wish I was wearing it right now cause it smells like you. But the main reason I love you, Marshall Eriksen, is you make me happy. You make me happy all the time." - Lily Aldrin (the sweetest marriage vow ever!)

Okay, I am really having a hard time defining these types of boyfriend that I am trying to point here. So here's the deal, I've recently realized that I want to have a ~barkada/ best friend~ type of boyfriend. One that I could have endless conversation just about anything under the sun. You could crack jokes that only the two of you would understand. 4 of my ex-boyfriends were like Ted Mosby, and most of the Marshall Eriksen type that I meet always end up as an "almost lover".

I've been in and out of relationship for the past 10 years and it is just with the recent ex-boyfriend that I've had this kind of realization. That's why when someone was trying to court me 3 months ago, I immediately turned him down cos I know that he's just another Ted Mosby. I really don't want to start our relationship in dating; set the friendship first, then let's see what happens next.

I think I have yet to meet my Marshall Eriksen. Or hmm.

Things had changed the past few months. I still want to meet my Marshall Eriksen, however, a little bit of Ted Mosby would be better. :)

Gabe Bondoc Will Tell You My Story

I have the biggest crush on this talented singer/songwriter/ guitarist/ nerd for almost 2 years now. Look how adorable he is whenever he's singing, and how dimples appear whenever he says "Ello" at the start of his videos.

So anyway, when people ask me "What's new with you?" or "How are you today", I'd just come up with several versions of "I'm fine", but there are really a lot of stories to tell. I was in the mood to listen to some of Gabe Bondoc's covers on my way to work this morning, and then it just struck me, that maybe a couple of Gabe's covers/original songs could somehow narrate or summarize those piled up stories.

So almost a year ago:

I Remember (Keyshia Cole)



I remember when my heart broke

I remember when I gave up loving you
My heart couldn't take no more of you
I was sad and lonely

Then an unexpected thing happened:

Fallin For You (Colbie Caillat)



I am trying not to tell you
But I want to
I'm scared of what you'll say
So I'm hiding what I'm feeling
But I'm tired of holding this inside my head

But you know that some things take time:

My Plan (Gabe Bondoc original)



Even though I like to keep you mine,
My plan is not to change your mind
I'll lock the feelings deep inside,
For another time, for another time

But no matter how you much you try to think that it's not meant to be, you just can't control what you really want and feel:

Stronger Than (Gabe Bondoc original)

I swear I'm stronger than these emotions
But they're taking over me

At the end of the day, you'd end up wondering if it is all worth it:

Chasing Pavements - (Adele)

Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If i knew my place should i leave it there?

There you go. Lol that was sappy.

Last Weekend

It was the weekend after payday and so I decided to splurge a bit and hang out with my friends.

Saturday:

I planned to go home immediately after work, cos I wanna have enough sleep before going out for a drink with my high school friends. But one of my office buddies, Justin, asked me to accompany him cos he wants to buy a new phone. I also ended up buying a new phone for myself. Heh.

I got this water jug as a freebie for that phone, and decided to give it to Zach instead.

And later that night, I went out for a drink with 2 of my high school friends. Too bad that the rest didn't make it. Also, it's one of the few times that I went out drinking and I don't get home drunk. Yay for me!

Nen, Flo, Kat

Franco, Mike, Rex

The pseudo-lovers. LOL!

So I was the "fifth wheel" during that night. Flo was with Franco, while Nen was with Rex. But then Mike came to join the fun, however, he just stayed for almost an hour. Still, it was a fun night!

Sunday:

I finally had a chance to hang out again with my best friend's twin brother, Anthony. It's been months since we were planning to meet up, but because of our busy schedules, it just wouldn't happen. I also bought him a scarf during my Baguio trip last February, and it was just this day that he finally got it.

We had these for lunch at Teriyaki Boy:

Then had some sweet dessert in Krispy Kreme after:

You may be wondering why he's dressed up like this. Heh. It's because he just came from a flight attendant application earlier that day. And then he needed to go home immediately after that, and since I was already in the Cubao vicinity, I decided to do some thrift shopping. :)

Things are different for this week, though. I'm just enjoying the bed weather so I might as well stay at home the whole day.

17 Days

So summady's excited for her birthday, eh? Yeah, maybe. But there are also certain things that made me giddy during the past few days:

1. Rainy Season
The rainy season here in our country usually starts by the end of May or the first week of June. I remember 2 years ago, I celebrated my birthday with no electricity because of Typhoon Frank. Lol. So when PAGASA announced that this year's summer would be extended on my birthday month, I thought that for the first time, I would celebrate my birthday on a hot weather. As much as I would like that to happen, I dread the country's temperature during the past few months that it was almost unbearable. But I guess we could now sleep under a blanket, cos the rainy season is finally here!

2. New camera / mobile phone
So it was last February when I lost both my camera and mobile phone. My phone was snatched from my mom when she borrowed it one night cos hers was broken. And as for my camera, I still don't have an idea how it got lost in our own home. So my mom gave me money in replacement of my lost phone, and I decided to buy a cheap QWERTY phone from Cherry Mobile. I heard it's pretty durable, plus I was eyeing for a phone that has a QWERTY keypad for some time now. Heh. I'm a cheapskate so brands don't matter. Then 2 days ago, my mom texted me that my grandma gave her a new digital camera. She's in the province right now, so I haven't seen the camera yet. Yay?

3. Morning Shift
I've been on graveyard shift for almost 3 years, and I think this is the longest time that I experienced sleeping at night. It's pretty relaxing, plus this reminds me of my student days in which I have to wake up before sunrise, and go home before sunset. Heh. But I miss my office friends cos they are all on night shift. Well, this is just temporary, though.

4. Weight Loss
Lol I dunno. Some people kept on noticing that I've lost some weight recently. Yay, right? But honestly, it's not intentional. Maybe I just lost appetite the past few weeks? But for the past years, I've noticed that I usually lose weight whenever I feel giddy, and I tend to gain weight whenever I'm broken-hearted. Lol on this body metabolism.

4. Lovelife?
For the past 3 years, I've been celebrating my birthdays with my then-boyfriends. But it will be different this year cos I'll celebrate it with friends, which would be fun! So who needs a boyfriend, right? Loljk. I just don't wanna elaborate on this stuff right now. All I can say that things are confusing, but overwhelming. I guess you can somehow connect it on my recent weight loss. Haha!

I an ThisClose on Calling it Quits

"You can ask the universe for signs all you want, but ultimately, we only see what we wanna see when we’re ready to see it" -Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother

So I've mentioned on my previous post that I wanna have a progress career-wise, and I think the universe had heard me, but not in a good way.

I have been putting up with this job for almost 3 years cos I was having fun. I know that every workplace has its own politics, but when people close to you are involved in your predicament, it's actually too much to bear.

I think it's about time to start a clean slate. I just need to find a perfect way out.

Just in time for my birthday

I wanna watch this in 3D with friends. I'm not sure if my office buddies are interested in watching this film, so I guess I just have to drag along my college / high school friends; either way, it will still be fun!

It's been more than 10 years since they've made Toy Story 2, so imagine my excitement when they've announced last year that there's gonna be a 3rd installment of this film.

Oh, what a joy!

A Month Before Turning 24

So aside from Christmas, there's another occasion that I am really looking forward to every year -- my birthday. I have always been giddy whenever this day comes because I feel special whenever people greet me (via SMS, social networking sites and of course, personally). I've had this habit of listing down the people who greeted me on my birthday but I think I stopped doing that when I turned 21. I also love it when unexpected people remember my birthday.

As I was browsing my old multiply site, I've seen several photos of my past birthdays (2007-2009), and it occurred to me that I've celebrated my past 3 birthdays with my last 3 ex-boyfriends. Lol. Yes, I was in and out of several relationships after graduating college but it doesn't mean that I wanted it to be like that; things just happen.

Also, I am a year behind the so-called "quarter-life crisis", and I think I am already experiencing one of its prime characteristics.

Disappointment with one's job:

This is no doubt the number one in my list. Well, I have been stuck in this job for almost three years, and nothing really fulfilling had happened. I am a registered nurse, and my license is about to expire next month, but I still have to use it yet. I am really not sure if I still wanna be on that profession, though.

Same time last year, I tried looking for a different job, but it wasn't really because of self-fulfillment issues, but mainly because I wanted to have a normal day job (just like my then boyfriend). But I guess things aren't really meant to be, and I wasn't that ready yet to leave this job.

I have 6 more months to go before this year ends, and I hope that at one point or another, my career would start to move forward.

On other note, I wonder how would this year's celebration would turn out.

These Emotions Are Hard To Deal With

So you've finally decided to give up hoping cos it seems that you're on a dead end street. But some things had happened that made you want to hate the universe for being so fickle-minded.

You agreed that you will just go with the flow, and that includes hoping AGAIN, but you know that this time you will just play it cool.

Surprisingly, someone wants to join the fun. That simple conversation you've had made you ecstatic. People thought you were stoned cos you just wouldn't stop smiling the whole day. You know this means complication but you know you're not doing anything wrong.

That same day, something came up that made your giddy emotions flipped 360 degrees. You've never been so jealous for the longest time and you hated the feeling, but it was inevitable. You want to leave right there and then, but you can't cos everyone would wonder why you're acting like that. You don't have a fucking right in the first place.

A big sigh with a heavy heart was all you can do at that moment. It's so hard to act normal when you're actually not okay. You know that you're overreacting but you just can't help it.

That's when you realize that no matter how giddy this other someone made you feel, a simple action from him would actually make a lot of impact on you.

And now you know that there's no point in confusion. The answer's already there. You just have to learn how to properly deal with it.

All I See is a Dead End Street

"There are certain emotions in your body that not even your best friend can sympathize with, but you will find the right film, or the right book, and it will understand you." -Bjork

Or in this case, the right song.

Soon enough, perhaps?

Still Can't Marry at Almost 24

I was sick last week, and my sore throat finally took its toll on my body, so I didn't go to work last Friday. My supervisor asked me to present a medical certificate, even though I barely go on sick leave. It was supposedly an easy task, since I am not lying about my sickness, however, our company decided to change our health care plan, and I haven't got my card just yet. I immediately asked my mom to help me get that medical certificate. It was a simple medical certificate, but I still can't get it without my mom's help. Lol.

You see, I am still living with my mom and I can't imagine myself moving out any time soon. We grew up with our dad cos my parents were separated, and we just got to live with our mom when my dad passed away 7 years ago. We had a hard time dealing with his death, cos we've been pampered when he was still alive. My dad would wake up at 4 in the morning, prepare our breakfast and our things for school. We didn't have to do any household chores except for dish washing and cleaning our room. We also stopped getting maids when I was in 3rd year high school, so he's the one doing most of the stuff around the house. There was this one morning after he died, that I woke up feeling sad, cos I miss waking up with a prepared breakfast. Don't get me wrong, though. It's not just because no one will do the chores for us. I will always miss my dad cos I was a daddy's girl back then.

My mom isn't really the typical housewife. She's always busy with work and other stuff. But she taught us how to wash and iron our clothes, just so we can deal with these things whenever she's not around. Still with these changes, I can say that we are still dependent on her. Back in college, there were times that she'll help me fall in line during school enrollment. Lol. Whenever I need some documents for some important work-related stuff, she's the one getting them for me.

I also have a confession to make: I don't know how to cook. Yeah, I know how to prepare instant noodles and fry easy meals, so every time my mom would let me do the cooking, expect some hotdog for lunch or dinner. I love hotdogs, btw. =)

I just wondered about this because there are too many wedding news for this year, and that includes my 2 college best friends who got / will get married this year. I'm sad though cos they are both out of the country, which means I can't be there on their special occasions. Oh well, live online coverage (lol) and photos will do!

On The Hook

I've been a fan of this show since late last year, and there are a lot of episodes that really made me laughed real hard. There could be a lot of misconceptions about life and love on this TV series (esp Barney's FYI's), however, there are just some scenes or issues that will make you think and sigh, cos you can see yourself (or past life) in the story. LOL.

So two weeks ago, I've had a marathon of the latest season's episodes and there's this episode (the 16th one, I think) entitled, "Hooked". Basically, it's about stringing along someone's interest in you until someone better is available. So here, you can be the one on the hook or the hooker, and that brings us to a regret I've had a couple of years back.

I wouldn't really know exactly if I've hooked someone on my strings, cos I'm not an ass like that, however there's this time when I've been on someone's hook -- big time.

I met him during my summer class in college. We became close cos he would usually tease me and I think we were seatmates back then. Even though classes had ended, we still kept in touch almost everyday. We talked on the phone for hours and texted each other every now and then. I really couldn't tell if he likes me, but I was beginning to like him cos he's really fun to be with.

We became busy with school stuff so we barely talk or see each other. Whenever we got a chance to catch up on each other's lives, he would share that he was beginning to like someone that started a month or two ago. So yeah, I kinda assumed it was me. Ugh.

Then there was this time that I saw him hanging out with a girl and that really shocked me. I asked him who she was and he told me that it was the girl that he's been referring to in his stories. I tried to keep my cool and said that I'm happy for him. I knew then that I had to move on and just accept the fact it's not meant to be. But I really dunno what happened then, that I managed to do the stupidest thing in my life: confess my feelings for him. It was such a shame. He told me that he liked me back when we were still hanging out a lot, but it just didn't last.

After that confession, we just remained friends and tried to bring things back to normal. I told you guys that admitting my feelings was stupid, right? That was because it began this "on the hook" thing. And here are the instances where he started controlling that string:

• Whenever he needs someone to help him with his school work, I would be the first person he had in mind. Even though my class would start at 12, he'd meet up with me at 9am cos his class would start at 10. Then I'll just bum around for 2 hours. And this happened not just once, twice nor thrice.
• Whenever he'll start dating / seeing someone new, I'm totally out of the picture. Like he didn't know me at all. And when he'd start calling my house / texting me again, I knew he had just broken up with that girl he had recently dated. And he would totally forget me again once he meet someone new. I thought that it was a never-ending cycle. My friends would scold me for being so stupid, but I just couldn't resist him. Yeah, just like that teacup pig in How I Met Your Mother.

The worst part on that "calling/texting me whenever a girl dumps him" happened in 2006. It was almost a year since we've last talked and he suddenly called me up. To tell you that I was surprised was an understatement. So we started catching up on those lost years, and there he told me that he just broke up with this girl he's been seeing for a year (yeah, that's why he forgot me for a year). I wanted to hang up the phone right there and then. But as usual, I can't. He told me that he still wanted their relationship to work and he's been trying to contact her for a couple of days already. Then after 30 minutes of talking, he said that he needed to go because this girl just texted him and said that they needed to talk. That was the last time that I got a chance to talk to him and up until now, I think that they're still together. He totally forgot that I existed and he even deleted me on his social networking accounts.

Look at how jerk he was, and stupid I was back then. It's been so hard to let go once you've been on someone's hook. I hate these "hookers" who take advantage on someone else's feelings, and just keep them around until someone better comes along.

I'm afraid that this could happen to me again because once you've been on the hook, you would never really notice that you've been hooked by someone. You'll probably be in denial, not until you see those small details that you've overlooked, and finally have the courage to move on, stop hoping and just cut the string.

Not A Flower Person

Word.

Of all the guys I've dated, there were only 2 of them who managed to give me flowers during a special occasion, and that would be my college suitor and my 4th boyfriend. The college suitor / college ka-barkadagave me a bouquet of roses on a random school day after I told him that I never received a single rose even though I've already had 2 boyfriends at that time. Oh btw, I just had 5 relationships plus some MU stuff during the past 10 years. Hrhr.

I was so giddy upon receiving the bouquet that I immediately inserted some of the petals on my Philippine History book. Huhlolz.

But over the years, I've realized that I would appreciate chocolates over flowers. Lol. But srsly, I just find flowers unnecessary.

So for my future suitor / boyfriend, no flowers please. Any artsy, cutesy stuff would do. Books, too!

Clean Slate

I am a social networking whore. Since Friendster began, I've signed up on every social networking sites that existed. I've also tried several blogging platforms and microblogging sites, too. I consider blogging as one of my emotional outlets. My friends are asking me what do I get out of blogging and I just tell them that I enjoy writing down my present predicaments and thoughts. To each his own, I guess.

When the year started, I started to realize that I have to start cleaning my online footprints. Especially my blogs from 2004-2008. They were too detailed and lulzy! To quote my recent ex-boyfriend "My stench is all over the internet". HUHLOLZ.

So I've already deleted my 2 blogdrives and wordpress (my outlet during my post-breakup with the recent ex-boyfriend) and privatized my blogspot (that contains a lot of posts about my college love life lol). I've also privatized my other entries here that contain my hatred for the recent ex-boyfriend. Hahaha.

I am thinking of deleting my Friendster account since almost all of my friends and relatives are already in Facebook. But then, I am still holding on to its memories. LOLWUT. So I guess Friendster's staying, for now. Also yesterday, I've already disabled my Formspring.me account. I dunno if I'll still enable it cos Formspring is so 2009. Heh.

So that leaves me with Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, Plurk, Last.fm and this Livejournal. Oh! I still have my i.ph blog but I can't delete it. I've already sent an email to the i.ph staff last year since they're the ones who could only delete that blog. But they still haven't deleted it, yet. Oh well. It doesn't really matter, anyway.

Speaking of Facebook, I already stopped making status updates about my current musings in life. Again, LOLWUT. I dunno. I don't wanna whine about random stuff every now and then. There's a better place for my 140-character rants and raves and that is Twitter.

Off to a good start, 2010.

A Sudden Change, Cynically Speaking

I think I am in my best mood to finish this journal entry that's been pending on my drafts for days now. Ok, indifferent feeling, bring it!

I never really liked this movie cos it's so shitty and emo. Plus, overrated. I'm always a chick flick type of girl and this film just makes me sad. I want happy endings, yah know. But watching it again made me realize something which I think changed my perspective on a ~certain~ aspect of life.

Taking chances was a part of my life. Yes, you've read that right. WAS. I was the type of girl that whatever I think that would make me happy, even without really thinking of the future consequences, I'd certainly go for it. Why would I bear the feeling of loneliness, if there are things that could make me happy. Life is short, is what I always say. I always see the glass half-full, never half-empty.

That specific scene from the movie made an impact on me but in 2 different ways. The first time I watched it, I was all "MEH, WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU. THAT'S BULLSHIT" at the back of my mind. Then after having a re-run just a couple of days ago, it suddenly hit me that maybe she was right. She certainly has a point.

My recent breakup was maybe one of the worse I've ever had but no, that IS NOT the reason I'm having this POV on romantic relationships. So what's the deal here? It's just that I suddenly realized that having a romantic relationship with someone would just complicate simple things. Heartache is definitely inevitable, however I just wanna spare myself from that feeling, as of the moment.

Aside from personal experience, I've had friends who underwent the same kind of dilemma just recently, which left me thinking, is it all worth it? Yeah, I know that you'll disagree with me. That why am I being this pessimistic on this idea. I've had several relationships, I tell you and they're all basically led to the same road - heartaches.

I just find it funny and I didn't expect that I would be thinking this way. The once-hopeless romantic in me, is now gone. Or not?

For now, that's my stand. I'm enjoying my life with friends and work. Life is simpler.

Or you know what? Maybe I just need someone who'll made me realize that another chance is worth a try, again.

*LOL EMO SHITFACE IS ON*